Think Toddler

As an Occupational Therapist (in my pre-home ed, pre-adoption former life), my pre-registration training included a module on Child Development, which included lectures and some study time around the developmental stages of children. Once I qualified, I quickly settled in Paediatrics as my area of interest/knowledge/growing expertise. During my twelve years as a Paeds OT, I attended a number of excellent courses focussed both on child development norms and the variations we would often see amongst the children on our caseloads. These courses often focussed on physical, emotional, social, psychosocial, linguistic, cognitive and sensory development. […]

Not quite ‘There’. Yet.

An awesome adopter friend wrote this beautiful and insightful post this week, about why our kids find it hard to relax and feel safe. No matter how often we reassure them and verbalise this in their early days (and years), there will likely be anxiety around loss for years to come. I read her post whilst I was sitting on the landing outside Little Legs’ bedroom door for the second night in a row, as we try to pull back on bedtime shenanigans, after weeks of her struggling to let go and just sleep. That […]

Sisters

We’ve been blogging for about eight months now. We blog about our family life, our adoption journey, our faith and our church family, home educating our girls and other parenting bits and pieces that may come along. During those eight months we have had frequent conversations, both before and since starting the blog, about what is off limits, what we wouldn’t or shouldn’t write about, how the girls might feel about the blog as they grow older and both they and their friends have access to the internet. This post is the kind of post that we […]

The need for support and understanding

A couple of weeks ago, Little Legs was under the weather and subsequently came out with some blisters, which I blogged about last week. So it may have been feeling under the weather that started it. Or it might not. As with much of this Trauma stuff, we never know what she’s trying to process. Or what’s playing on her mind. Or what she’s emotionally sorting through at any one time.Trik Android But right at this moment, she’s a sad, angry, frustrated and confused little girl. And then she’s sweet and gorgeous and happy. Singing […]

Forging family relationships

This last week we had our first direct contact between Little Legs’ Foster Mum and Little Legs. I’ve been chatting with her lots on WhatsApp and sending photos and updates regularly, but there has been no direct contact with Little Legs for the year she has been with us. Rightly or wrongly, we have been feeling our way to find something that feels right. For Little Legs, for our family and for theirs. There is so much advice out there about continuing contact with foster families, initiating contact with birth families, and maintaining relationships with […]

Bittersweet for all

Throughout the ‘pre-approval’ phase of the adoption process, we were warned about the more difficult aspects of the process: invasive questions about our relationship, our finances, our parenting skills. Then we were advised that we might be in for a long wait for a potential link, due to our family being slightly unconventional: already having three birth children, home educating, being in leadership of a church. During prep groups, conversations were had with regards to common preconceptions that prospective adopters have about the children waiting for matches. About the numbers of children awaiting adoption from […]